Labeling Sexual Identity
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The topic for this meeting is Labeling Sexual Identity. This perspective is an interesting topic for a GAMMA focused discussion which looked at questions such as:
1. Do you identify as gay, straight or bisexual or something else? 2. Has the way in which you think of your sexual orientation changed over time? 3. While identifying as gay today, do you still feel sexually attracted to women (often, sometimes, occasionally?) 4. Do you feel that none of these three categories fits your sexual orientation? 5. Do you think that an approach that acknowledges sexual fluidity will help us better understand ourselves and make better sense of the array of different experiences that GAMMA men bring to the dialogue? |
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Over decades, GAMMA men have used three labels to define their sexuality: gay, heterosexual and bi-sexual. More often we tend to label ourselves with only two categories: gay and straight. Bi-sexual men have experienced some pressure in the gay community to "make up their minds" with the implication that identifying as "bi" is either a cop-out on the individual's part, or a transitional phase (about which there is some discussion in the literature).
As the thinking about sexual identity becomes more complex, people (particularly the young) have begun to reject these three boxes and prefer to think about sexuality as more fluid, and even changing over time. They tend to distinguish between sexual identity and sexual attraction.
Here are extracts from an article from the Huffington Post By Dr Joe Kort titled: The BRO Phenom, and the Demise of Sexual Labeling: An App That Connects Straight Men for Sex Is Challenging Simple Definitions (01/26/2016):
"Not all that long ago, there were a relatively small number of words we used to describe sexual orientation: heterosexual (straight), homosexual (gay), bisexual (attracted to both genders), asexual (not attracted to sex), etc. But over recent decades, it's as though our culture's subterranean sexual boiler, the one that produces and reinforces the hot new labels and language trends, has become super heated. Facebook, for instance, lists some 51 sexual orientation labels by which users can identify themselves, and these are ever expanding on countless Internet sites and discussion forums. It's enough to make therapists, who often see it as our responsibility to name the slippery things going on in our psyches in order to help our clients with identity problems, a little despondent."
......."Once we begin to realize that there can be such a thing as an erotic identity coexisting with a different sexual identity, and that either of these states of mind are fluid and can change over the course of a lifetime, then we begin to think it might make sense to get out of the naming game altogether ... if only we could."
....."Most people outside of the sex-therapy community have never considered the existence of a multi-universe of sexual identities, but those of us immersed in this stickiest of human foibles have come to realize that there is much yet to discover."....."One has to ask, then, is it really essential for us to have labels for the seemingly endless nuance of sexual expression?" ....."From my point of view, however, the need for a label pales in comparison to the potential, perhaps, for a community to develop for men who have not yet found their own cultural and/or sexual and/or erotic identity, men who identify as heterosexual, but who are aroused by the eroticism of gay sex, or men who are simply trying figure it all out."......"So, given the ongoing explosion of sexual awareness rising from the basement of our cultural psyche, there very well may come a time when we are forced to abandon our proclivity to pigeonhole our preferences altogether, despite the unease this is likely to cause members of various subcultures. With the tectonic plates beneath our cultural psyche shifting so rapidly, we may have to learn how to maintain our balance and simply stand tall for who we are, and live with the ambiguity."
As the thinking about sexual identity becomes more complex, people (particularly the young) have begun to reject these three boxes and prefer to think about sexuality as more fluid, and even changing over time. They tend to distinguish between sexual identity and sexual attraction.
Here are extracts from an article from the Huffington Post By Dr Joe Kort titled: The BRO Phenom, and the Demise of Sexual Labeling: An App That Connects Straight Men for Sex Is Challenging Simple Definitions (01/26/2016):
"Not all that long ago, there were a relatively small number of words we used to describe sexual orientation: heterosexual (straight), homosexual (gay), bisexual (attracted to both genders), asexual (not attracted to sex), etc. But over recent decades, it's as though our culture's subterranean sexual boiler, the one that produces and reinforces the hot new labels and language trends, has become super heated. Facebook, for instance, lists some 51 sexual orientation labels by which users can identify themselves, and these are ever expanding on countless Internet sites and discussion forums. It's enough to make therapists, who often see it as our responsibility to name the slippery things going on in our psyches in order to help our clients with identity problems, a little despondent."
......."Once we begin to realize that there can be such a thing as an erotic identity coexisting with a different sexual identity, and that either of these states of mind are fluid and can change over the course of a lifetime, then we begin to think it might make sense to get out of the naming game altogether ... if only we could."
....."Most people outside of the sex-therapy community have never considered the existence of a multi-universe of sexual identities, but those of us immersed in this stickiest of human foibles have come to realize that there is much yet to discover."....."One has to ask, then, is it really essential for us to have labels for the seemingly endless nuance of sexual expression?" ....."From my point of view, however, the need for a label pales in comparison to the potential, perhaps, for a community to develop for men who have not yet found their own cultural and/or sexual and/or erotic identity, men who identify as heterosexual, but who are aroused by the eroticism of gay sex, or men who are simply trying figure it all out."......"So, given the ongoing explosion of sexual awareness rising from the basement of our cultural psyche, there very well may come a time when we are forced to abandon our proclivity to pigeonhole our preferences altogether, despite the unease this is likely to cause members of various subcultures. With the tectonic plates beneath our cultural psyche shifting so rapidly, we may have to learn how to maintain our balance and simply stand tall for who we are, and live with the ambiguity."